


You're Going To Hate Me For This

by Gaysoundsaboutright



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Borrowers Fusion, Angst, Borrower Logic | Logan Sanders, Human Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Tiny Sides (Sanders Sides), Unsympathetic Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Warnings are in the chapter notes!
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-09
Updated: 2020-10-23
Packaged: 2021-03-07 16:47:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 10,497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26910877
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gaysoundsaboutright/pseuds/Gaysoundsaboutright
Summary: It's winter, borrower!Logan is very very sick and has just been found by human!Virgil. Just read the story pal.
Comments: 18
Kudos: 57





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings: sickness, breaking promises, non consensual spread of sensitive information, holding a person against their will, separation anxiety, angst, morally ambiguous Virgil
> 
> Not related to my other borrowers fic!

"Oh you poor thing." The human whispers, and Logan blinks up at them blearily. His whole body is one big ache, one exhausted hollow, one pale, trembling dot, so insignificant to the cold, cruel world. "C'mon now. Open wide."

Warmth. Warmth!! Logan's mind screams at him, and he cries out in response, would curl away if he had the strength for it. Instead, he lays there sobbing, little tears streaming down his cheeks as his mind tries to figure out whether he needs or hates this strange heat that's being pressed to his delicate lips. 

"Open up please." The human coaxes. "It's milk. Food. For eating. Well, drinking but-- Food. It's food."

Food? Logan's tired mind slowly processes the word. Food. Yes. Food is good, he thinks. Food, yes. He opens his mouth, and a nozzle that's way too wide for his liking slides in. On instinct, Logan suckles at it, and oh! Food! The liquid is warm, sliding smoothly down his dry throat, and Logan cries out in bliss, suckling harder, desperate to fill his stomach. There's a pain somewhere in there from drinking so much so suddenly, but Logan doesn't care. 

"It must have been ages since you last ate huh?" 

Logan whines in confusion and desperation as the nozzle is removed. Where has it gone? He's still hungry! He's still hungry!! 

"No, no. Don't worry, it's coming back." The human soothes, and Logan gasps as gigantic,  _ warm _ fingers curl around him, shifting and moving in a gentle massage. "Here, fruit juice. Need to get your blood sugar back up."

It's sweet, Logan absently notes. Tangy? He isn't quite sure, if he's being honest. Whatever. It tastes like  _ something _ , something good actually, though by this point he wouldn't really care if it tasted like dirt. It's  _ something _ , something that's filling him up, and that's all that really matters.

"Woah uh…" Logan whines as the nozzle is pulled away. "Maybe that's enough for now yeah? You're looking a bit bloated there…"

Logan makes a small noise with no real meaning at all. With just the tiniest bit of his strength regained, he manages to curl up on the human's hand. It's only a loose palm, Logan lying right in the centre, but other fingers are pressing at him, massaging him carefully. 

"You can call me Virgil. They/them." The human, Virgil now, offers. "... Do you have a name?" 

"Logan." Logan croaks out. "He/him."

"Cool." Logan feels Virgil shift about awkwardly, fidgeting. "Uh… Not really sure what to do right now to be honest… Maybe um… But I guess you need to rest right?" 

Rest? Yes, that sounds good. Just a short little rest. Not sleep, because that's dangerous right now, Logan thinks. Why exactly, he can't remember, but… Logan yawns, grasping for Virgil's thumb and hugging it. Just a short rest. 

"Aww…" Virgil murmurs, and Logan practically purrs as the human runs a hand through his hair. 

He isn't really aware of too much after that, only that he wants more food after this. And another nap. And the nice warm human had better not be going anywhere either!

\---

Logan wakes slowly, still dizzy and tired. He moves slowly, pushing off the soft but heavy purple fabric covering his body. 

… Purple fabric? Logan pauses. Well that's not right, he definitely doesn't have any purple fabric in his house, certainly not a piece as big as this. He frowns, seeing a shoddily sewn dress next to him, along with a piece of paper that says… Something. Logan squints at it. Normally he prides himself on being literate, an extreme rarity among borrowers, but now… Well whatever. He slips on the garment without questioning it further, tying the long ribbon into a nice little bow. Uneven stitching aside, it's quite pretty really, fitting his small form perfectly, and with the cold of the room he can certainly appreciate the thick fabric and long sleeves. 

Yawning a little, he stumbles to his feet. The floor under him is made of black fabric, and incredibly soft, with more give than cloth should have on a solid surface, which is another thing that strikes him as strange, but his tired mind dismisses it in favour of finding more food. The soft terrain does greatly reduce his mobility though, so he has to crawl instead, and he's not really entirely sure where he's going either… 

"Oh? You're awake!" The voice rumbles through the floor under him, and Logan yelps, falling over, but a gigantic hand curls around him, propping him back up. "Ah that tickles! Stop moving about please?" 

Oh. A  _ human _ . Virgil, he half remembers. Logan's mind short circuits, chases a conclusion, delves deep for a decision, but ultimately blanks. 

"Oh you found the dress!" Virgil is saying, a smile gracing their lips, before it turns into a worried frown. "Is it okay? It's not much, but it's clean, at least. I wanted to make you a shirt and pants, like you had before, but I couldn't figure out how to make shorts so uh… Oh and um, I could probably take your clothes to be washed if you like? They're kind of dirty… Um I mean no offense but-- Am I talking too much? I'm sorry, I'll just shut up. I'm sorry." 

"It's fine…?" Logan eventually manages to say, and Virgil nods slightly, fidgeting. 

After a while of awkward silence, Virgil cups their hands around Logan's tiny form and carefully lifts him up, and Logan clings to the nearest finger for balance. The appendages are almost as big as he himself is, Logan numbly notes. 

"Er… Are you hungry?" 

Logan manages to nod, and Virgil smiles. 

"Oh, awesome. I'll um…" The hands close around him, but Logan can't bring himself to care that he's now trapped. "Hold tight!" 

Everything around him moves, a dizzying rush of colour that has an oddly steadying rhythm, one that's so overwhelming that Logan briefly passes out. When he comes to again, he's on cold marble. Safe ground, he notes, solid. Freezing, but solid. Carefully, he props himself up, going slow so as not to make himself more nauseous. 

"Do you need the dropper again, or do you want solid foods?" 

Logan blinks slowly, then shrugs. Virgil purses their lips, then turns away, returning with a quarter of a strawberry. They place the food in front of Logan. Some sense returning to him, Logan eyes the food warily, but then crawls forward and takes it. The fruit is sweet, the juices a relief, and he eats quickly, putting away the whole fruit in just fifteen minutes, by which point Virgil has returned with a bottlecap, filled to the brim with steaming milk. 

"Here. Drink up."

Logan nods numbly, taking the bottlecap, big enough to be a dinner plate for him, and drinking the warm liquid inside. Huh, that's a new feeling, his body actually not demanding more food for once. Odd. 

"Full?" Virgil asks quietly, and Logan nods, prompting the human to whisk away the remaining milk. Too late, Logan realises that he should have used it to refill his bottle. 

His bottle. Where is it? Where's his backpack? Oh dear! All his stuff is in there! Not a lot of stuff, but pretty much all of his essentials! 

"Uh… What'cha looking for little guy?" 

"Backpack." Logan slurs out, still looking about frantically, as if that might magically make his things spring back into existence. 

"Oh! Yes yes yes! I'm so sorry! I forgot all about that!" Virgil scrambles about for something, and not a moment later the tiny sack is carefully set in front of Logan. "Here you go."

Logan nods a thanks, taking it and doing a quick inventory. Or well, as good of an inventory he can manage right now anyway. He probably has everything. Probably. 

"So umm…" Virgil shifts about, fidgeting nervously. "Are you okay?" 

Not really, Logan wants to say. He's full for once in his life, but he's still exhausted out of his mind, and really really dizzy. He's too hot and too cold at the same time. The marble under his feet is  _ freezing _ , painfully complimenting the winter chill all around, and he kind of wants to rest his forehead against it, kind of wants to be swaddled in warmth again, and the conundrum is making his mind spin, all of it so much that he's almost about to throw up. 

"Yeah, you're not looking too good there pal…" Virgil reaches for him, resting a thumb against his forehead, and Logan leans in, making a small noise. "You've got a fever! Hold on, maybe I have some medicine I can get you…"

The human leaves again, and Logan thinks that maybe he should be trying to escape (escape what?), or something but… He crawls over to the edge of the table, then backs away again. Nope. Way too high. Well, not higher than anything he scales on a daily basis but… He looks at his hook and string, then back at the drop, then at the fluffy purple cloth that he woke swaddled in, now neatly folded on this kitchen table. 

Maybe just a quick nap, then he'll attempt an escape… 

\---

Virgil hums quietly, carefully adjusting their grip on the little human. So tiny… So so tiny. And Virgil is terrified. 

He's asleep again, even after already having slept for a full thirty six hours, and Virgil is terrified that this time he's going to sleep forever. Logan's just so  _ delicate _ . Awfully malnourished, the bags under his eyes rivalling Virgil's own. The way he ate the offered food, so much of it, so quickly, so desperately. The way he stumbles and crawls around, dazed and confused, gaunt, pale and sickly. Virgil is scared for the poor thing. They really hope that they gave him the right amount of medicine, because with how weak Logan is, a fever might well do him in. 

He makes a small noise, shifting in his sleep, and Virgil murmurs a reassurance, running a finger down his back in the hopes of soothing them. After a moment, he settles, then turns over, latching onto Virgil’s pointer finger with a surprisingly strong grip for his size. Virgil can't help but coo, wrapping the rest of their hand around him, and Logan snuggles right in, practically purring. 

His hair, Virgil notices, it's so  _ soft _ . They run a thumb over it, feeling the silky smoothness as the Logan whines in response, leaning in. It's  _ adorable _ . Virgil pulls him in, setting Logan on their chest and curling up around him. 

"I'll protect you." Virgil assures him. "I'll do  _ anything _ to keep you safe, I swear it." Virgil smiles, giving Logan's small form the gentlest of squeezes, loving the little noise that Logan makes. "You just rest, just stay right here. I'll take care of you!" 

Carefully, Virgil slips Logan into their hoodie pocket, making absolutely sure that the little thing isn't being smothered by the fabric, and that he won't fall out either. Through the house Virgil moves, collecting the materials they need. They get their phone and open up YouTube tutorials for sewing clothes. They spend the rest of the next few hours sewing together scraps of fabric, putting together patchy but warm clothes for Logan, and once they have a sizable pile of garments, they move on to other accommodations for Logan. They carve at a bottlecap until they've got a proper plate, make a fork and spoon with a bit of aluminium foil, and a lot of difficulty, removes the glass bit of a little led and turns that into a glass. They put neat little servings of carefully cut up fruits, bits of chocolate, portions of cereal, servings of orange juice, doses of medicine, all of it stored neatly in pill boxes, ready for use at any time. 

A little while later, Virgil feels something warm and wet drip onto their thumb. For a moment they panic, loosening their grip, expecting tears but… It's sweat. Virgil could cry in relief. Logan's fever has finally broken! 

Doesn't mean he's fully recovered though, Virgil knows, seeing the still somewhat dazed state Logan us in. And  _ this _ fever may have passed, but with the cold of winter? Logan's  _ vulnerable _ . Well, it'll be alright. Virgil will protect Logan, no matter what! 

\---

Logan's too weak to resist, he knows. He lies there quietly in the human's, Virgil's, palm, opening his mouth and letting Virgil dribble just a drop of medicine in, and then the human carefully helps him sit up, bringing him some water and a bottlecap of warm food. Logan takes it without question, without checking for poison, scarfing it down greedily. 

His body is still too tired. He's still sick, for one thing. Just fevers and a sniffle or two, but for borrowers you can't say 'just' anything, because  _ anything _ could kill them. And then there's all the repercussions of years of near starvation, of going weeks with just a crumb, of exhaustion, days and days without sleep, all of it rushing back and making him hungry and sleepy all the time, as if his body is afraid this abundance of food and rest will be gone soon. 

It will have to be, eventually, Logan knows. But he also knows that right now? He doesn't have the strength to mount an escape, doesn't have it in him to survive on his own. He'll die without this human's help. So… 

It's not half bad anyway, Logan thinks to himself. Not only does he have all his needs more than provided for, but Virgil is exceedingly gentle with him. Which is not to say that Logan hasn't got a few bruises, because beans  _ never _ know their own strength, but at least the human's  _ trying _ to be careful, tries to accommodate his needs. 

Logan leans in as Virgil begins to stroke his hair, gently, so as not to accidentally pull at it. They're also wonderfully affectionate, which Logan appreciates a normal and healthy amount. 

"Are you feeling a bit better?" Virgil asks worriedly, and Logan shrugs and nods in response. 

He tries not to speak, if he can help it, unless there's absolutely no other way to communicate his desires or distress. Virgil is surprisingly perceptive, so thankfully he's able to get most things across with just gestures. And the human has never tried to force him to speak either! That's definitely something Logan's grateful for, but he knows this patience isn't going to last forever. Virgil's only being gentle because Logan's still recovering, and as soon as Logan's well again… 

No. No, Logan's not going to think about that right now. Logan's just going to shelve that thought away for much, much later. It has a simple solution anyway. Just feign sickness for an extra few days, get any food he needs, and move the hell out. It's not like it'll be difficult anyway, because Virgil seems to trust him enough to leave him unattended to retrieve things from other parts of the house, giving him enough of a window to get back into the walls, if he so wished. But… 

"Are you tired again?" 

Logan nods, curling up in the human's palm, and oh that's a lot, him, a  _ borrower _ , just  _ here _ , about to  _ nap _ in the clutches of a  _ human _ . 

"Alright, get some rest yeah?" 

Logan doesn't respond, curling tighter and waiting for sleep to claim him. It doesn't though, so instead he's treated to Virgil rocking him, just a little, beginning to sing quietly. 

"You poor thing…" Virgil mutters after a while. "I'll be honest… You're still so weak, improving but… I worry. I don't want to risk stopping the medication or missing a dose, in case your condition worsens again and… And I don't know how else to help you! I want to bring you to a proper doctor, make sure I'm giving you the right medicine, make sure there's no other medicines you need to take but… You wouldn't like that, would you?" Virgil sighs heavily, and Logan feels the human shift. "I'm not stupid, I know you would have rathered we never met at all. You're scared of me, and I know you'll run as soon as you're well again but I…" Virgil snorts. "Oh look at me, talking with a sleeping, tiny man. And I'm still doing it. I…" Logan feels something warm and wet splash onto him, and it takes everything in him not to react. "Ah geez! I'm sorry!! Oh dear, you're all wet now! Here, let me just…"

The rest of the words fade out, and when Logan opens his eyes again he's quite sure a significant amount of time has passed. Virgil's the one who's asleep now, passed out on the couch, hands still cupped protectively around Logan's comparatively tiny form. Logan can't help but lean into the touch, craving the contact. It's warm, so wonderfully warm and solid and  _ safe _ . 

Safe. He's safe here. Virgil won't hurt him. Still… Logan has to just make sure, so when Virgil wakes… 

"You won't tell anyone about me, right?" 

Virgil smiles down at him, raising him up to eye level. 

"Not unless I have your explicit permission."

"And you wouldn't keep me here against my will?" 

"Of course not! You're free to come and go as you please! I'd  _ never _ force you into anything!" 

"And you'd never hurt me?" 

"Never!" Virgil swears. "I'll protect you, no matter what the cost!!" 

"... I believe you." Logan smiles, but then it drops. "I'll admit… it's just that… It's just that that's kind of scary." 

"You have nothing to fear Logan." Virgil assures him. "Not as long as I'm here."

Logan nods, relaxing against Virgil, letting the human play with his hair. 

"I'm a borrower." He tells Virgil after all. "And when I say that I mean that we're a species and so if ever you find someone like me…"

"Of course." Virgil promises. "If I ever find a borrower like you, I promise I'll help them."

"Thank you." Logan whispers. 

"Are you planning to stay?" Virgil asks softly. "It's okay if you don't want to but…"

"I'll stay." Logan blurts out before he can change his mind. "I want to stay."

\---

Coughs wrack Logan's tired body, shaking his tiny frame. 

"It's okay." Virgil soothes him. "No, don't try to speak. Here, drink."

Logan nods weakly, opening his mouth and letting Virgil dribble water in. It cools his throat, but almost immediately his mouth dries back up.

"Here." Virgil takes out a lozenge the size of Logan's head, removing a small piece and giving it to Logan. "It's going to be sort of spicy. Minty. Do you know what that tastes like? Don't worry, it'll make your throat feel better, okay? Don't swallow, just suck on it." 

Logan nods, putting the medicine in his mouth, lying there quietly as Virgil fusses over him. He's sick.  _ Again _ . Frustrated tears spring to Logan's eyes. Each time he thinks he's getting better, that he's recovered… 

"Hey." Virgil whispers, and a finger as big as Logan himself is brushes away his tears. "Don't cry. Please don't cry. You're going to be just fine. I promise."

Logan nods. He trusts Virgil, but as his vision blurs, nasuea welling up inside of him, he's not quite sure if that's a promise Virgil  _ can _ keep. 

\---

"You're going to hate me for this." 

Logan blinks, the words pulling him from his hesitant rest. 

"You'll probably be  _ right _ to hate me for this." Virgil continues. "But I  _ have _ to do this. I  _ have _ to protect you. Please know that I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"H-huh?" Logan stutters out, very very eloquently, and he feels Virgil rub and massage his tiny arm, fidgeting in that way the human only fidgets when they're truly nervous. "What?" Virgil doesn't respond, but Logan feels them tense. "... Virgil? Virgil what are you talking about? What's going on? Wait where are we? Where are we going!?" Logan scrambles and struggles to sit upright in Virgil's pocket, panic flooding his mind. "Virgil! Virgil you're scaring me! Where are we going?!?" 

Virgil takes a deep breath, then releases it as a heavy sigh. 

"... To the doctor."

Logan freezes, feels an odd disconnect settle over him, as if his mind can't quite connect the sweet gentle wonderful kind loving human who's been caring for him with someone who would-- Who would actually--

No. Tears prick at his eyes and a panic attack seizes him, turning his breathing stuttering and laboured. No. No no no no no no no no no no no no  _ no _ \--

"No!" He begs. "Virgil you can't! Don't! Please please I'll do anything I-- I'll be a good pet! Virgil please! No!!" 

"You're not a pet." Virgil immediately and vehemently denies. "You're not! I'm sorry but… I thought you were getting better… But now you're sick  _ again _ and it's getting  _ worse _ and I…" Virgil runs his pointer finger down Logan's back, and Logan shudders and curls away. "I need you to  _ live,  _ Logan. I  _ have _ to protect you! I can't just sit by and let you  _ die _ !! I  _ have _ to take you to the doctor." 

Logan shakes his head frantically, only really registering the part where Virgil maintained that he was going to  _ show Logan to another human _ . 

"No Virgil wait please-- You can't! You can't you can't please don't Virgil please you can't-- Humans can't see me!!" 

"...  _ I'm _ a human."

"Yeah but-- You're different!" Logan stops, swiping angrily at his tears, cursing himself for not seeing this coming. "Or…" Logan slumps over, tears flowing freely from his eyes. Who's he kidding? He's five  _ inches _ tall, and Virgil… Virgil's a  _ human _ . "Or I  _ thought _ you were different."

"..." Virgil swallows hard. "Yeah. I-I'm selfish aren't I? Risking your w-whole species being discovered, just because I've gotten attached to you. B-but Patton is a good person! I trust him. He'll be good to you.  _ He'll _ be different."

Logan doesn't respond, just lies there, his little tears staining Virgil's pocket. It isn't long before he grows tired again, becomes too weak to struggle anymore, vision flickering as his strength seeps away because goddammit Virgil the stupid stupid  _ stupid _ human is right, he's not going to  _ survive _ without medical attention. And despite Virgil's betrayal, he  _ wants _ to believe the human. Because, much as Logan is loathe to admit it, there's  _ nothing _ left to do now but trust Virgil’s judgement. 

And despite everything, he  _ does _ trust Virgil's judgement. 

\---

"Virgil." Logan finally speaks up, as the last dregs of winter's cold bite fade away. 

Virgil was right. Patton was a good man. Patton treated Logan like an equal, like a friend rather than a stranger or patient. He didn't mention Logan's size at all, apart from when he took Logan's measurements to calculate the dosages. Thanks to Patton, Logan made a full recovery, and now knows a fair bit about what to do if he falls ill again, with any of the more common diseases. 

"I have to go." Logan tells Virgil, hoping he sounds firm, hoping he sounds braver than he feels. "You helped me, you took care of me, you saved my life by bringing me to Patton, but you also betrayed my trust. I have to move."

And Logan knows what Virgil's going to say before the human even opens their mouth. Knows it from the sudden desperation, the terror in Virgil's eyes. Knows it from the way Virgil jolts up, curling around Logan. Knows it from the way Virgil's grip tightens, almost enough to bruise, as they pull Logan to their chest and hugs him tight. 

"You're going to hate me for this." Virgil whispers. 


	2. Freed (Bad Ending)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> These next four parts are going to be alternate conclusions to the first part of this story!  
> This one is, like the title says, the one where Virgil frees Logan, and it goes badly. Please note that only Freed (Good Ending) will have an actually happy ending!  
> So uh... Virgil is a major asshole in this one. Heed the warnings please!!  
> Warnings: gaslighting, imprisonment, cages, threats, injury, treating a person like a pet, major character death, survivor's guilt, crying, kidnapping

Virgil knows the instant Logan dies. There's a sharp, sudden pain in their chest, so much that they almost collapse, and then they  _ know _ , know with a  _ horrible _ certainty. They let Logan go just a day ago, when the guilt had finally become too much, and now… 

And Virgil… Virgil wishes… Virgil wants-- They can't help but think that they should have… Virgil searches frantically, but they know from the start that they'll never find the body. They hold a small funeral anyway, through which they just can't stop crying. There's nothing to bury, so in place Virgil buries a little bouquet of flowers, that they themself arranged. Ash leaved trumpet flowers, asphodel, red columbines, arranged around the centerpiece flower, an European sweetbrier, and Virgil makes sure to put out fresh ones every day. 

It's their fault, Virgil can't help but think. Maybe if they hadn't betrayed Logan's trust, if they hadn't forced Logan to stay, then maybe Logan would have  _ wanted  _ to stay. 

…Or maybe if they  _ had _ kept Logan. Kept Logan here in their safe, warm house, where Logan would never have gone hungry, would never get hurt, would never have  _ died _ . Because Virgil was  _ right _ weren't they?! Virgil  _ knew _ that Logan was too tiny, too  _ delicate _ , too  _ weak _ , to survive on his own! Logan would never never  _ never _ have died if Virgil hadn't let him go! 

Yes, Virgil should have just  _ kept _ Logan, because sure, it'd be an infringement or Logan's freedom, but Logan would be  _ alive _ . 

A few months later, another borrower moves in, and Virgil captures them easily. 

"I had a borrower like you, once." Virgil idly comments as they stroke the borrower's spine, a sick, twisted part of them  _ loving _ the way they flinch and struggle desperately. 

"F-fiend!" The borrower shrieks, fighting and fighting. "L-let me go!!" 

"His name was Logan. Oh, and mine's Virgil! They/them, if you please. What's yours?" 

"I-I'm not telling you! Leave me alone!" 

Virgil shrugs nonchalantly. 

"Very well. I think I'll just call you Princess then."

"Excuse you! I'm a  _ man _ , thank you very much! A very manly man!!" 

"Oh, are you trans?" 

"... I don't owe you that information."

"Alright alright." Virgil smiles sweetly. "I won't pry. He/him it is. And your name, dearest Prince?" 

"..." The borrower swallows, averting his eyes, but then finally chokes out an answer. "My name is Roman."

"Roman." Virgil tests the name on his tongue, loving and hating how this borrower's and Logan's names end the same way. "A lovely name. It's nice to meet you Roman."

"T-thank you…?" Roman stutters out. "Wait no! I-it's not nice to meet  _ you _ ! You're  _ kidnapping _ me! Let me go!!" 

"Kidnapping you?" Virgil laughs, running a hand through Roman's hair, delighting at the way Roman squirms. "Oh don't be mistaken little prince! I'm here to  _ help _ you!!" 

Roman looks up at them, confusion and terror on his face. 

"H-help? No! I don't  _ want _ your help!! Get away from me!" 

"Oh come now, of course you want my help! You  _ need _ my help!" 

"But--" 

"Don't you want to know what happened to Logan?" 

Roman glares up at them, seeming to physically snap himself from his confusion. 

"Well he's not here right now, and you're not particularly nice so--" 

"Oh no!" Virgil chuckles. "Don't be silly! Of course I didn't  _ kill _ him. Well, not  _ directly _ , at least."

"... What's that supposed to mean?!?" 

"See, I let him go."

Roman furrows his brows in a frown, confused. 

"Uh… Good? So are you going to let me go or--" 

"And then he died!" Virgil smiles cheerily, even as they wipe a tear from their eye. "He died because I let him go off on his own."

"Hold up--" 

"And see, if I let  _ you _ go off on your own, you're going to  _ die _ too! I can't let you  _ die _ !! You don't want to  _ die _ , do you?" 

"No but--" 

"Well great!" Virgil grins, grabbing a pretty red ribbon with their free hand. "Then it's decided! You're staying!!" 

"Hey wait--!" Roman stutters out, squirming as Virgil's gigantic fingers come  _ way _ too close to his neck for comfort, tying the ribbon into a neat little bow there. 

"Don't worry about the bow too much yeah?" Virgil pets Roman, rather patronisingly, dabbing a drop of superglue onto the knots they've tied. "It's just to make sure you don't go running off and getting lost! I'll snip it off when you prove yourself trustworthy, yes?" 

Roman's not sure which is worse, being collared like a dumb animal, or having a pair of blades, each  _ bigger than he himself is _ , near his  _ neck _ to cut said collar off. 

"And in the meantime, it does make a lovely accessory!" Virgil comments. "Compliments your pretty brown eyes! Oh! Wouldn't you look handsome with a little suit to go with that bow!!" 

"Well that's nice of you to say but really--" 

"Why, you're just the prettiest little thing, aren't you?" Virgil chuckles lightly, giving Roman a flick to the side, and Roman cries out in pain as the breath is knocked from his lungs, as he stumbles back and falls onto hard, cold marble. He bursts into tears, the full weight of the situation finally hitting him as Virgil roughly ruffles his hair, messing it up. As Virgil snatches his rucksack from him, snapping the delicate little strap. 

"No! Wait please! Don't!!" 

Virgil tuts, playing with the red ribbon as they extract a sharpener blade, a pin, a hook, then just dumps all the contents out on the desk carelessly. 

"Why, you could  _ hurt _ yourself, playing with things! We can't have that now, can we? I'd be a bad friend if I let you keep these!" 

"But--" 

"Anyway, it's not like you  _ need _ these anymore!" Virgil waves a hand dismissively, tossing the rucksack into a nearby drawer. "Why would you, when you have  _ me _ here to  _ protect _ you?" 

A part of Virgil is  _ horrified _ by his own actions, feels sick to the stomach everytime he walks past the gilded birdcage he's put Roman in, twists painfully as he watches Roman sit there and sob, wants nothing more than to let the poor borrower go, to apologise and apologise and apologise and apologise and apologise. Virgil knows Logan would  _ never _ approve if he saw Virgil now, would  _ never _ forgive Virgil for what he's done to poor Roman but… 

But every time Roman's pleas make the guilt too much to bear, every time Virgil goes to untie the ropes, every time Virgil makes to get rid of the cage at  _ least _ \-- 

Every time he so much as considers letting Roman go, there's a sharp pain in his chest, and he sees Logan  _ dying _ . Now he doesn't know  _ how _ Logan died, exactly, but he sees it happening anyway, all too vividly. 

He sees poor little Logan making the long, arduous trek to the next house over. He sees a bird, a cat or some other predator descending on Logan, snatching Logan up, tearing Logan apart piece by piece for a  _ snack _ . 

He sees Logan reaching his new home, and immediately getting captured by a new human, a human who is not half as kind as Virgil was. He sees the human toying with Logan, experimenting on him, outright torturing him. Sees Logan being killed once the human has gotten bored, squashed underfoot like a spider, the body incinerated to get rid of the evidence, or tossed thoughtlessly into a trash can to rot away slowly. 

He sees Logan lost and cold and alone and hungry and dehydrated and utterly utterly  _ exhausted _ , wasting away slowly and painfully in a gutter by the side of the road, in the walls of an unfamiliar house. Dying there all alone. Wanting nothing more than to be back with Virgil. 

And Virgil sees Roman dying in the exact same ways. And Virgil adds another tight knot to the ribbon around Roman's neck. Adds another lock to Roman's cage. Grips Roman so tightly that he makes Roman  _ cry _ , leaves dozens and dozens of bruises all over the borrower's delicate little body. 

But it's all worth it, Virgil decides. Because sure, Roman's depressed now, terrified out of his mind, abject hut obsequious. But… He's  _ alive _ , and Virgil's  _ sure _ he'll come around eventually! 

… Eventually. 

\---

Ash-leaved Trumpet Flower: Separation. (red) 

Asphodel: My regrets follow you to the grave. (white) 

Columbine, Red : Anxious and trembling.

Sweetbrier, European: I wound to heal (pinkish red)


	3. Freed (Good Ending)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This one's the good ending, where Virgil frees Logan, and it goes well! No warnings for this one! (but if you find any, do tell me!)

It's only two days before Virgil caves to their conscience, giving in to the guilt. 

"You can go." Virgil whispers. They set Logan down on the ground, avoiding the borrower's eyes, the shocked, tentative hope they hold. "I'm sorry. I should  _ never _ have-- I'm so sorry! I  _ kidnapped _ you! I--" Virgil swallows, scrubbing at his eyes. "You can go."

There's no ceremony to it, just Virgil, on the verge of tears, giving Logan all his things, some food and anything Virgil made for him during Logan's stay. 

"Just please." Virgil begs. "Don't move out. I'll never bother you again, I swear but-- I need to know that you'll be okay.  _ Please _ ."

Logan doesn't answer, but holds eye contact as he takes a wary few steps away from Virgil. Virgil nods resignedly at the lack of response, letting Logan walk over to the entrance to the walls. Logan can't help but breathe a sigh of relief at this lack of movement, picking up his pace. 

… But Virgil looks so  _ sad _ , so  _ scared _ . Scared for Logan. Terrified for his safety and… 

"F-fine." He grits out, unclenching his fists. "Fine. You were good to me. I won't move out. But if you dare try to capture me again, if you even  _ touch _ me again…"

Virgil gives a watery smile and resolute but resigned nod. 

"I promise." Virgil whispers. 

"... Close your eyes." Logan commands. "You don't get to know where my entrances are."

Virgil obliges, and when he opens his eyes again, Logan's gone. Virgil stands slowly, goes to his room, and throws himself a pity party. 

The borrower doesn't reappear again, not for a long, long while. So long that Virgil's afraid that Logan's moved out after all. But still, Virgil 'carelessly' leaves out food, bits of cloth, pins and staples and bottlecap, anything he thinks Logan might find useful. And then finally… A stack of crackers disappears. Virgil feels sheer relief wash over him when he notices, feels the tension in his body ebb out, just slightly. 

He leaves out more food, more small items, and as Logan gets bolder about taking the food, Virgil gets bolder about leaving it out. One night, he leaves a notepad out, the really tiny kind, filled with handwritten facts he copied off the internet, and at the last page, a proper, full apology to poor Logan. 

The notepad disappears two days later, and after a week Virgil finally hears back. It's a really short note, but Virgil doesn't care. 

'Am well.' The note reads. 'I am under no obligation to forgive you, but I appreciate the apology. Ps. Please tell me more about these 'stars'.'

Virgil is more than happy to oblige, diligently copying out dozens and dozens of facts about the stars, myths and legends and research, even including several photos. Virgil gets a tiny thank you note in return, and they put it up on their wall, pinning it neatly to a corkboard. A few days later they put on a documentary, then make a big show of leaving the house, not returning until half an hour after the show has ended. They find another thank you note, and so Virgil does it again, and again, and again. 

Then one day they are surprised to find Logan passed out on the couch when they return, the TV still blaring. Virgil badly wants to pick them up, to check for injuries, to feed him full, to hold him close and keep him warm and safe but… Remembering their promise, they fight down the urges. Still, they set down a small plate of food next to Logan and, seeing that Logan is shivering, turns down the air conditioner. 

Virgil strongly suspects that Logan was awake the whole time, and it was all a test, because that night becomes a turning point for the two of them.

Because the next morning, Logan is still sitting there, eating the food. Virgil is given a wary look when they enter, but Logan doesn't try to leave. 

"Don't make me regret this." The borrower warns instead. "If you betray my trust again…"

"I won't, I promise." Virgil swears. "I… I could just go to my room or something, if you want." 

"... Stay."


	4. Trapped (Sort of Good Ending (No One Dies))

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This one has a rather ambiguous ending!  
> Warnings: kidnapping, patronising actions, attempted self starvation, morally ambiguous Virgil, Stockholm's syndrome

There's a marked few changes in the way he's treated, after Logan tries to leave, the foremost of which being that Virgil stops leaving him alone if they can help it, takes away his tools and puts him on tall furniture, from which there is no way down. 

"It's for your own good." Virgil tells him. "I need to protect you!" 

Oh Logan fights like hell for his freedom. He shouts and screams, punches and kicks, refuses to talk, refuses to eat, refuses to drink. 

"The silent treatment?" Virgil rolls their eyes, pinning a snarling Logan to the table easily and stuffing the dropper into his mouth. "Really? C'mon! I'm just trying to help!" 

Seeing that strikes, silence and struggling doesn't work, Logan moves on to threats. 

"I-I'll spill grape juice all over your laptop!" 

"It can be replaced." Virgil shrugs nonchalantly, but moves the device to a higher shelf anyway, before leaning down to pick Logan up, running a hand through his hair, even as Logan hits at them. " _ You _ on the other hand…"

"I'll hide your keys!!" 

Virgil just chuckles, ruffling Logan's hair. 

"You're literally in the palm of my hand right now. Not many places to look."

"... Well." Logan glares up at them. "I'll dismantle your phone and break all the little pieces!" 

"Dude, just give it up already!" Virgil rolls their eyes. " _ Nothing _ is worth more to me than your safety."

So Logan tries guilt tripping. 

"Nothing?" Logan averts his eyes. "Well I guess… I'm safe but… What about my  _ freedom _ ? My  _ choices _ ? My  _ happiness _ ? Don't you  _ care _ about my happiness?" 

Virgil snorts, waving a hand dismissively as they bring Logan over to the couch. 

"Alright then. You have the  _ freedom _ to  _ choose _ what you want to watch tonight. That should keep you  _ happy _ for a few hours."

Logan stomps his little foot, spitting an expletive at Virgil. Virgil does not respond to this, instead turning on the TV. 

"Nature documentary it is." They shrug. 

"You think I'll fall for this ruse?! A cage by any other name is still a cage  _ Virgil _ ! You can't just  _ buy _ my  _ subservience _ , my  _ freedom _ , my  _ life _ with some stupid television program about--" Logan squints angrily at the TV. "--those… Whatever they are! Wait how they do that?! That's so cool! Wait no! I won't get distracted! I--"

Logan ends up listening with rpat attention, eyes firmly glued to the TV screen, not even noticing when Virgil gets up and makes popcorn for the two of them. 

So, correction, Logan fights like hell for his freedom  _ at first _ . 

Because… Because he's being treated well, isn't he? He has everything he could  _ ever _ want! He gets to eat well, sleeps soundly, warm and safe. And Virgil gives him volumes and volumes of books to read, hundreds of fascinating documentaries to watch, even (tries to) give Logan an education, something Logan has  _ always _ wanted! 

And Virgil is  _ incredibly _ doting, something that Logan… Something that Logan can't  _ bear _ to be without. Because attention and affection is something Logan has since realised that he craves desperately, that some messy, illogical part of him  _ needs _ like he needs to  _ breathe _ . He needs to be  _ listened _ to, needs to be  _ cared _ for, needs to be rocked and soothed to sleep. Needs to be  _ loved _ . It's stupid, he knows. It's absolutely  _ pathetic _ . But… 

And Logan hasn't tried to fight back for  _ weeks _ now, hasn't protested in any way, content to give himself up to Virgil's 'care and protection'. And he tries to remind himself that, even if this is a particularly nice prison, he's still practically Virgil's prisoner. He tells himself that he's just biding his time, waiting for Virgil to let their guard down so he can find an opportune moment to escape but… 

"Hey." Virgil speaks up. "I'm back from the store. Got us some ice creams."

Logan just grunts, burrowing deeper into the nice little nest of blankets he's made for himself. Virgil pokes at him gently, and when that doesn't elicit any further response, they pick him up carefully, cradling Logan in their cupped hands. 

"Aww…" Virgil coos. "You're half asleep! Adorable!" 

Mortifying, Logan thinks to himself. Humiliating. Pathetic. Demeaning. Degrading. Patronising. Stupid. Illogical.  _ Weak _ . 

But sure. Adorable. Yeah. Logan knows this is far from a healthy relationship, knows he's got himself a bad case of Stockholm's syndrome, knows he's only enabling Virgil by being such a servile sycophant but… 

"Tired?" 

Just a quick nap, Logan decides. Then he'll try to escape.


	5. Trapped (Bad Ending)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This one's gonna be realllyyyyy sad!
> 
> Warnings: sickness, holding a person against their will, cages, crying, major character death, attempted self starvation, injury, fear, morally ambiguous/unsympathetic Virgil (good intentions, bad actions)

It isn't long before things devolve to cages and threats, before Virgil has to keep a sharp eye on Logan at all times, to watch what they give to the little man, lest it's used for an escape. Logan definitely isn't making it easy for them, kicking and screaming and punching and yelling and biting and spitting and doing  _ anything _ he can do to make it harder for Virgil. But despite the twisting pain in their chest, despite the hard cold pit of guilt they're drowning in, Virgil remains steadfast. Especially when Logan falls sick again. 

And so, though it hurts Virgil's heart to watch Logan try to starve himself, though Virgil's heart grows a little heavier every time Logan tries to escape, though they feel like crying themself as they watch Logan cry himself to sleep, though it pains Virgil to see what little trust Logan still had in them wither away. Through it all, Virgil persists, sure that they're doing the right thing, sure that Logan will understand, one day, will thank them someday. 

And then one day, one seemingly perfectly normal day, because hell, force feeding Logan, wrestling him to keep him from starving, all of it has become normal now but--

But Logan suddenly screams. Virgil is horrified to find that they don't even  _ realise _ it's a cry of pain at first, only taking it as a chance to finally stuff the dropper in Logan's mouth, but then they see the expression on Logan's face. The terrified, terrified,  _ terrified _ expression. Virgil frowns, lifting Logan up to inspect him. 

"Uh… Logan? You doing okay…?" 

Logan stares fearfully up at Virgil, frozen in terror, his breathing stuttering and shallow and panicked. He's clutching at his arm, and Virgil sees that--

No. It's  _ broken _ , Virgil realises, realises that  _ they _ did that. No! 

"I--" Virgil quickly sets Logan down, stumbling back, and Logan mirrors his actions, scrambling backwards too, cowering in a corner, trembling and trembling. "I-I didn't mean to! I just wanted to--" 

"You… You said you wouldn't hurt me." Logan whispers, his already tiny voice even quieter than usual, but Virgil hears it anyway. "You  _ promised _ you'd  _ protect _ me. But… Heh." With his uninjured hand, Logan scrubs at his eyes. 'You  _ lied _ . Just like you lied about not telling anyone about me. About not keeping me here against my will, and now…" Logan closes his eyes, but that doesn't stop the tears from falling. "I-I really thought you were  _ different _ ." Logan whispers. "I really hoped that maybe… A part of me hoped that maybe even this  _ kidnapping _ …"

Virgil reaches out, but Logan doesn't even  _ try _ to run. He sits down, still holding his injured arm gingerly. He sits down and curls away, rocking himself back and forth, back and forth, back and forth, tears streaming endlessly down his cheeks. He doesn't resist when Virgil picks him up, just sits there, silent and still. 

Virgil does their best to wrap up Logan's broken arm, but after several failed attempts, more cries of pain from poor Logan… 

"Just take me to Patton." Logan tells them tiredly. The little man chuckles bitterly, shaking his head sharply. "And let irony be irony."

Something twists painfully in Virgil's chest, but they just nod. Neither of them answer an extremely concerned Patton's persistent questions about how it happened. 

And Logan closes himself off completely after that. He doesn't speak to Virgil, not a peep. He stops trying to run, just sits there, gazing up at Virgil with a blank yet accusatory stare, or sleeps, sleeps for hours and hours and hours. He's still, but always trembling, always shivering, always cowering away from Virgil. But he stops fighting back, and Virgil is able to get some food into him with the dropper but… But he only seems to get more gaunt, more sickly with every day. Virgil suspects that he's throwing the food up behind their back, on purpose or because he's just that sick, Virgil doesn't know. Probably both. And Virgil tries their best, gives Logan the healthiest foods, makes sure he takes all his medication, tries  _ everything _ to help Logan recover but… 

But Logan watches their futile, increasingly desperate attempts with a resigned challenge in his eyes. Well, the look says, either you let me go, or I'll let myself wither away, make your choice. With every day the guilt gets heavier, harder to bear, but… But Logan is sick  _ and _ injured now! He won't  _ survive _ if Virgil let's him go. 

But it's  _ Virgil's _ fault he's like this. But he won't  _ survive _ . But it's all Virgil's fault, it's all Virgil's fault! But he'll run off Virgil will never even  _ know _ if he dies or survives! 

"Please!" Virgil begs. "Please Logan! Logan you  _ have _ to  _ live _ , okay?? I  _ need _ you to live!! I-I'll let you go! I'll let you go once you're better! I swear I will!" 

"... Fool me once, shame on you." Logan murmurs. "Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me thrice, well I'm just a halfwitted  _ imbecile _ , aren't I?" Logan snorts humourlessly, burying his head in his hands, and Virgil sees tiny tears leak out. "But a fourth time, Virgil? You didn't  _ really _ think I'd actually  _ believe _ you, right?" Logan shakes his head. "There are fates worse than death, Virgil. And being here? Being nothing more than a  _ pet _ to you, and no don't say that I'm not a pet, because you're definitely  _ treating _ me like one. Being under your so called protection?" Logan turns to face Virgil, and his gaze is so sharp, so sorrowful, so resigned, so resentful, that Virgil blanches, actually stumbling back. "I'd rather  _ die _ , Virgil."

Virgil does everything they can to help Logan recover, but without a will to live… You can't save those who don't want to be saved. 

Logan is dead before the end of the month.


	6. Freed Bad Ending Pt 2, Good Ending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ((going to be good ending))
> 
> (((I know, I know, it's going to get confusing))) 
> 
> Also, I can't write poetry 
> 
> Warnings: Treating a person like a pet, fear, gaslighting, cages, crying, attempted suicide, unauthorised spread of sensitive information, injury, morally ambiguous/unsympathetic Virgil

Please, my captor murmurs

Do stop crying.

I slap away their hand, hiss

Are you kidding?!

\---

"... Roman, did you write this?" 

Roman pales, instantly recognising the tiny piece of paper pinched between Virgil's thumb and pointer. 

"No!" Roman quickly and vehemently denies. "Of course not!" 

Virgil snorts, making to throw the teensy sheet of paper away, but then they think better of it and stuff it in their pocket. 

"Oh  _ yes _ , because there are other borrowers here, and I gave them all little pieces of paper and bits of pencil lead. Yep."

"I-I didn't mean it!" Roman tries to lie, and god he can already feel tears pricking at his eyes in anticipation of the pain that's coming. "It's um.. It's for a character I'm writing! Yeah!" 

Virgil shakes their head. 

"You're a horrible liar, Roman. Don't you  _ dare _ do this again. You  _ know _ I'm  _ helping _ you. You need to learn to  _ appreciate _ it. You know I'll have to take away your writing materials for this."

Roman's learnt by now not to resist, so he nods. 

"Yes Virgil." He murmurs. 

Virgil smiles softly, ruffling Roman's hair, leaning down to give Roman a small kiss on his forehead, and Roman fights desperately to keep still and just take it. 

"I know you don't understand why I can't let you do these things." Virgil runs a hand through Roman's hair. "I know you're upset with me. But you're just sixteen. One day you'll understand. One day you'll thank me."

\---

One two three four

Tell me what I'm in here for

Five six seven eight

I have nothing but time to wait

Nine ten eleven twelve

Lots of time yet none to delve 

Thirteen fourteen fifteen sixteen

As to why I'm in a cage, I'm just a teen!

\---

Roman nods quietly. 

"Yes Virgil. I--" Roman feels the tears betray him, starting to fall. "I…"

Virgil sweeps forward, scooping him out of the cage. 

"Oh Roman." They murmur. "Don't cry."

This is what's called irony, Roman thinks to himself, but he doesn't say this out loud, of course. 

"Will you tell me more about Logan?" He finally asks. 

Virgil likes talking about Logan, even though it makes them cry. And Roman likes to  _ hear _ about Logan. Some twisted, morbid part of Roman  _ likes _ to learn about this man, who has made Virgil grieve so much, whose death has given the human such a cruel definition of protection, yet who isn't at fault at all. 

"Of course." Virgil agrees. "What do you want to hear?"

And Roman means to ask something mundane, something trifling. Something like, what was his favourite food, his favourite colour, what did you two talk about. Something nugatory, but instead… 

"Did you ever put  _ him _ in a cage?" Roman blurts out, immediately regretting it as Virgil freezes up, raw, open shock on his face. 

Eyes wide, Roman cowers away as it changes to anger, to rage and--

And then to guilt. Roman sees it, just for a moment, just the tiniest flash, before Virgil shoves it down, and it's replaced by sadness, then regret and resentment. 

"No. But maybe I should have."

"Really?" Roman demands before he can stop himself. "Do you think  _ he _ would have wanted this? Do you think he would want to be stuck behind  _ bars _ ?" 

Virgil bites his lip, making a small, distressed noise, and a tiny flicker of hope ignites itself in Roman's chest. 

"You think he'd be alright with this, if he was here?" Roman presses. "What about  _ you _ ? Would  _ you _ want to be in a cage? It seems it's a simple choice for you, but you're not the one trapped in here. Would you--" 

"Enough." Virgil snaps. "Enough!!" 

"You say you keep me in here to keep me alive, but in a cage? Am I living at all?'

"Stop!" Virgil screams at him, so loud that Roman has to clap his hands over his ears to keep from being deafened. "Stop it!! I can't! I won't! I need to keep you safe!! Get out of my head!!" 

"I'm not in your head Virgil!" Roman yells back. "You are! You  _ know _ this is wrong, you  _ know _ there has to be a  _ better _ way!!" 

"Shut up!" Virgil shrieks, slamming his hands down next to Roman's cage so hard that the mini earthquake it causes makes Roman stumble and fall. "Enough!! Just  _ stop _ !"

"Virgil  _ please _ \--!" Roman begs, finally breaking down, tears flowing freely at his eyes. "Please! I-I don't want to be trapped in here for the rest of my life!! I hate it in here!" 

"I'm going to bed." Virgil tells him shortly. "Goodnight."

"I hate you!!" Roman screams after him. "I hate you! I hate you so much y-you filthy, lying, gaslighting--" 

\---

You're horrible, you know that? 

I fight for my freedom, you say I'm a brat

You're one of the worst people I've ever met

You care for me, yes, but it's as though I'm a pet

Yet even as you're hugging me too tight 

I know a part of you knows that this isn't right! 

You have to feel some guilt! 

Everytime I cry, I see you wilt

I wish you would just give in to your conscience 

Then maybe we could be done with this nonsense

Sometimes I even wish we could be friends

But the bars separate us, and I know how this ends

\---

"Roman!!" Virgil shrieks. 

So close. Just a few more inches to the ground and he'd have been free, but instead… Instead he's lying in Virgil's soft palm, badly bruised but alive and… Trapped. Still trapped. He's still  _ trapped _ . 

"Roman  _ please _ ." Virgil is begging. "Roman talk to me!! Tell me what's wrong!!'

Roman couldn't respond, even if he wanted to, just sits there and sobs and sobs and sobs. 

"Roman…" Virgil murmurs to him. "Please don't cry! God, what were you thinking, _jumping_ _off my hand_?!" 

Roman doesn't answer, just curls away, rocking himself back and forth, ignoring Virgil's persistent questions and the pain spasming through his battered body. 

"... You look pretty roughed up from that fall. Did you break any bones?" Virgil finally asks.

Roman gives a noncommittal shrug, wincing as it pulls at his shoulder, and Virgil draws a sharp breath at the pain on his face. 

"Okay, you've definitely injured yourself in  _ some _ way." Virgil sighs. "I'll need to--" 

"No!" Roman shrieks "No! Don't you dare!! I--" Roman sucks in a deep breath, trying to push the pain off his face. "I-I'm  _ fine _ ! I can just--" 

"I am  _ not _ allowing you to just walk this off." Virgil interrupts. "I may have been able to break your fall halfway but--" 

"You  _ never _ listen to me!!" Roman screams at them. "Don't you  _ understand _ what you're  _ risking _ if you show me to someone?!" 

"It'll be fine, Roman." Virgil assures him. "I brought Logan to this exact same doctor and--" 

"And he was okay with that?" Roman hisses out, and the words make Virgil stop short, stumble back a step, their grip on Roman tightening, just slightly. 

"..." Virgil swallows. "I mean-- He would have  _ died _ without medical attention! For all we know  _ you _ might have broken something important and that might--" 

"Why do you think I jumped to begin with?" Roman chokes out. "I  _ wanted _ to break something important and just-- And just…"

"Roman!" Virgil snaps, horrified. "Roman please!! Stop it!" 

Roman averts his eyes, scrubbing angrily at the tears streaming down his face. 

"... Look. I-I need to get you checked over, okay?" Virgil asks quietly. "I'll call Doctor Patton over, no chance of anyone accidentally seeing you. Patton won't tell anyone, I swear it."

Roman snorts, burying his head in his chest. 

"Not like you'd  _ listen _ if I told you it's not okay anyway." He mutters morosely. 

Virgil swallows, but nods quietly. 

"I need to keep you safe." They murmur. "I  _ have _ to keep you safe… N-no matter what the cost. I have to."


	7. Freed Bad Ending Pt 2, Bad Ending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This takes place after Freed (Bad Ending) and ends really badly! Please heed the warnings!
> 
> Warnings: Substance abuse, injury, crying, abuse, anger, treating a person like a pet, threats, gender dysphoria, cages, chains, murder, suicidal ideology, unsympathetic Virgil, major character death (Roman)

They wipe their tears, reach for a flask

They've been doing that rather often 

I don't dare to question, don't dare to ask

But after drinking they handle me with less caution

\---

"I wish you would just  _ understand _ !" 

Well  _ I _ wish you'd let me go, Roman thinks to himself, not responding. Yet here we are. 

'Why do you fight? I'm helping! I'm doing all this for you!"

Roman feels tears wet his face. His whole body is bruised, one giant ache, black and blue dancing up his pale skin. 

"Did you get drunk for me too?" He asks before he can stop himself. Quickly, he claps a hand over his mouth, looking up at Virgil with wide, terrified eyes, flinching away and cowering, expecting punishment but--

\---

They close their eyes, count to three

Fine then, they say, if that's how you want to be

They pause, glare, say; But you won't like me when I'm angry

They walk away, I sit down and cry

Asking myself why me? Why? 

Why why why why why why why?

I'm never getting out of here

I'll always have to live in fear

All your 'love' is insincere 

Matter of fact, you relish my every tear

This is my prison, it'll be my grave, the place I die

I know it already, why do I even try? 

But there's so much I haven't done, I don't want to say goodbye! 

But I'll never get to do it because I--

Why me? Why?

\---

Virgil hums, absently stroking Roman's hair through the bars of the cage. 

Roman  _ hates _ it. It'd be an annoyance, even if it was done by someone who wasn't his  _ kidnapper _ , because it  _ completely _ messes up his hair. Now maybe this isn't the time or place to worry about how he looks, and he's never really been particularly vain but… Can't he just have this  _ one _ thing?! Because the mornings are the  _ one _ time of day he can guarantee to himself, and he spent a long time on that hair dammit! But Virgil thinks it's  _ cute _ the way he squirms and yells for the human to stop, and the human loves to let him smooth it back down, only to mess it up again a moment later. 

"Adorable!" Virgil is cooing. "Oh you're so  _ cute _ !" 

"Now see, when you're a borrower calling a borrower cute, that's a compliment." Roman glares defiantly up Virgil. "But if you're a  _ human _ calling a borrower in a  _ cage _ cute, that's just  _ sick _ !" 

Virgil frowns, tugging sharply at Roman's hair, smiling slightly when Roman yowls in pain. He leans in close, getting all up in Roman's personal space, before flicking him so hard that Roman goes flying back, landing  _ hard _ against the cold metal bars. 

"You want to repeat that, little prince?" 

"N-no Virgil." Roman quickly answers, bowing his head, and hurriedly scrubbing away the tears dripping down his cheeks. 

"Very good!" Virgil praises. "Now shut up and let me admire you."

\---

You tell me this is all for my own good

Say your actions are misunderstood 

Then put me in a bow that triggers my dysphoria

Stick me in a cage, call it a utopia

The bow is a mockery

And the ribbon is a chain 

The cage is a graveyard

And you smile at my pain

…… 

I see red at their audacity, I've put up with it for long enough! 

I stand up, I yell; What's  _ wrong _ with you?! I'm in a  _ cage _ !

They frown, ask, and it's a threat; Would you rather be  _ dead _ ? 

Yes Virgil, I whisper. They nod; Glad we're on the same page 

\---

"No, I don't think we are." Roman murmurs. "I mean: Yes, Virgil, I  _ would _ rather be dead."

And then there's a sudden rage in Virgil's eyes. They're drunk again, Roman absently notes. 

"Then  _ die _ ." Virgil hisses, and there's pain, and then nothingness, and the nothingness is a relief.


	8. Freed Bad Ending Pt 2, Ambiguous Ending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This takes place after Freed (Bad Ending) and ends ambiguously! 
> 
> Warnings: Stockholms Syndrome, abandonment mention, sickness mention, abuse mention, death mention, gaslighting (?), treating a person like a pet, morally ambiguous/unsympathetic Virgil

"Winter's coming." Virgil murmurs. 

Roman blinks blearily at the human, not daring to resist, though he  _ hates _ the way Virgil picks him up by the back of his shirt. 

"Winter was when Logan got sick. He stumbled out here, dizzy and weak and half starved…"

Oh, Roman thinks to himself.  _ Oh _ . 

"I saved him, took him in and cared for him." Virgil continues. "It got really bad. He was delirious or unconscious a lot of the time." a smile pulls at Virgil's face, even as tears stream down his cheeks. "But so snuggly. It was really cute. I tried to make him his own bed once, because I thought it'd be awkward to wake up on a stranger but… He kept shivering, looked so  _ miserable _ , no matter how close to the heater I placed him. And when I put him back on my chest?" Virgil chuckles fondly. "He was practically  _ purring _ ."

Roman swallows. 

"Were you two very close?" 

"Not as close as we could have gotten, as we  _ should _ have gotten, because he left at the end of the winter and…" Virgil swallows, drinks deeply from the wine bottle on the table. "That was my fault, for letting him go. I should  _ never _ have risked…" Virgil shakes their head, fidgeting with the ribbon around Roman's neck. "But it doesn't matter now. I won't make the same mistake twice."

Virgil turns to Roman, beginning to stroke his hair. 

"You tell me right away, do you understand? I know it's only mid-fall, but let's be honest,  _ any _ season could potentially be dangerous for you. Even a sneeze, a sore throat, a little cough… If you need to be placed closer to the heater, need an extra blanket…  _ Anything _ you need, I'll provide, understand?" 

"Yes Virgil." Roman agrees. "I'll tell you immediately."

Virgil nods, settling back in their chair, but soon enough they begin to fidget, then they get up and begin to pace, agitated. Finally, they wipe away their half dried tears and snatch up their keys. 

"I'm going to the store." They tell Roman. 

And see, Roman is relieved beyond measure, basks in the thirty minutes during which Virgil is gone. But when Virgil returns… They return with a bundle of thick cloths. And they cut a small piece and place it on Roman's bed, to be used as an extra blanket. They sit down next to Roman's cage, and begin to sew. Slowly and meticulously, they cut out the tiny pieces of fabric, then they stitch it together, double layer it, put a teensy bit of cotton in between the layers, for extra insulation. Roman watches them make every neat stitch, each one so tiny that they must be  _ dots _ to Virgil. At the end of it, Virgil smiles down at him, putting the little garments in Roman's already huge pile of clothes. 

"There we go! You will  _ never _ freeze to death, not as long as  _ I'm _ here to take care of you!" 

Roman swallows, stands slowly, walking over to the pile and examining his new clothes. Despite everything, the artist part of him  _ admires _ the craftsmanship, appreciates the teensy embroidery on the back, a golden crown dotted with red rubies. 

"It's beautiful." He admits. "Thank you."

Virgil preens, ruffling his hair, leans down and presses a gentle kiss to the top of Roman's head. 

"I love you." 

"... I know."

\---

It isn't fair! You know it's not fair! 

How on earth can I hate you when you hold me close

When you pat me, murmur; there there

When you compliment me, make me new clothes 

But you keep using me, absuing me

Loving me, taking care of me

Confusing me, confounding me

Keep saying that you're helping me 

But I've been alone all my life

Surviving starvation, abandonment and strife

And I hear your stories, hear that this Logan was happy

And I wish we could be like that too

If I stop resisting, then maybe just maybe… 

I know you're grieving, and if I were to work with you…

\---

"Virgil." Roman speaks up out of the blue, in the midst of that winter, before he can change his mind. He offers the human a charming smile. "I love you too."

Virgil lights up, grinning widely as he leans down and scoops Roman up, hugging him to his chest. 

"I knew you'd come around! You understand now, right? This is all for your own good! Your happiness!" 

Roman nods obediently, leaning into the embrace, giving in. What's fighting going to do? Why  _ bother _ anymore? It's… It's not even  _ that _ bad. Right? 

"Yes Virgil. I understand."


End file.
